Sun and ceremonies..

Wasn’t it a nice day today…? I nipped out the back and caught a few rays, set up the bunny cam on a timed exposure (so you can admire my svelte, buff, beanie bod – I lost 4 grams last week!) only to spot a red kite circling overhead. The picture shows me looking a little surprised, and about to run very quickly in the opposite direction..



And there’s me going on about my life not avoiding birds of prey..

I’ve been literally inundated with an email today, from a well-wisher who’s been on the prowl for all things a liberated Rabbit should be kept informed about. Bearing in mind our somewhat controversial attitude to monogamy, and conjugal indifference (I am of course totally different in this respect – I am a New-Rabbit) I am delighted to bring you the following..

[Here come’s the bride, all dressed in fur..]

Now I have a fairly limited wardrobe, but I do know how to carry off a chapeau. That BIG one looks like he’s eaten a Blues Brother..

Many thanks to my correspondent, but in the true style of an upwardly-mobile Rabbit, I was actually invited to the event.

Trust me, a society occasion it was NOT.

The brides parents disgraced themselves – Mummy rabbit went commando, revealed when she fell over doing the bunny-cokey, and Daddy got "tired and emotional", falling asleep face down in a bowl of bunny kibble. His bleary eyes lit up later in the evening when the food ran out (a CARDINAL sin at a rabbit function) as all the similarly intoxicated female guests went in for what he thought was a peck on the cheek, but in reality was to pick off the bits of dried food stuck to his aged bunny jowls.. As the happy (drunk, morose, arguing) couple left, the bridesmaids (all 300ish cousins of the bride) went to work on getting to know the single male bunnies a bit better.

And not a single one of them tried to cop off with me.

I wonder if it was the monocle..?

Speed dating tomorrow. Going to go a little more contemporary - I think offering them some snuff could be a winner..

Criminal activity in the Shires..

Times are hard for us..

Feelings are running high in Wiltshire where recent greenhouse raids have denuded the horticultural population of large amounts of pakchoi, and resulted in prosecutions and ASBOs galore (Anti-Social Bunny Orders). A minority of bad rabbits spoiling it for us law abiding long-ears.

But no one could have expected this..

[Click here for scandalous news]

Who would have believed it? Columbunny is apparently shining his private glass eye as we speak to investigate this scary state of affairs..

Speed dating set up for Tuesday.

Paws crossed everyone..

(o;3

Rabbits need some bunny to hug..

In the high pressure era of freeze-dried, flat-packed, high-speed, quick-dry, one-coat, fast-track life, it's hard for the successful Rabbit about town to find a little bunny to hop around with. A bunny to hug. A little lady bunny who might say "I doe".

("Doe" - do you see what I did there..?)

I do meet lady bunnies, but there are so many with "issues". There are the hard drinking "buckettes", the less than beautiful bunny boilers, the precious honey-bunnies, the desperate housebunnies; the list goes on.

So I'm seriously thinking about "Rabbit speed-dating": My associate Neville (so often affected by tragedy) tried it a couple of weeks ago. Corner of a shady field, lead rabbit with an egg-timer and a circle of lady bunnies waiting to be impressed by a Rabbit of means. (That's me, if you hadn't guessed..)

He hit it off with a little lady bunny, went to a little night-club burrow, and drank chilled carrot juice until dawn. They left paw-in-paw and licked the dew off the spring grass. It was all too perfect.

He walked her along the road to her burrow oblivious to everything else, and as she gazed into his eyes the van delivering the early morning post ran over her head..

Que sera sera I suppose. I'll let you know how it goes..

(o:3

Well, here I am..

Allow me to introduce myself..

I'm Rabbit, and despite what you may think, my life is not all munching grass and avoiding birds of prey. Oh no. There's much more depth to your average Rabbit than you may think at first glance...

I travel the world (usually in hand luggage, admittedly), enjoy opera and fine wine (when they remember to put it in my drinks bottle), eat out in some of the best fields in the country and enjoy days at the best spas (see picture).

The world is a different place through the eyes of a small furry being with a beanie bum, and I thought it was high time to share it with all of you. It's a responsibility being me you know..

So bookmark me, visit often, and participate in my guide to life.

You owe it yourself.

(o;3